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The Power of Likeability: Why People Remember How You Make Them Feel

Introduction Have you ever noticed how some people walk into a room and instantly become likeable? They don’t need to prove anything. They don’t try too hard. Yet, people naturally feel comfortable around them.   It’s not because of their title, achievements, or status. It’s because of how they make others feel.   Likeability is often misunderstood as charisma or natural charm. In reality, it is not something you are born with. It is a set of behaviors, habits, and small actions that create a strong emotional impact on others.   In both personal and professional life, this is one of the most underrated success skills. People may forget what you said or what you did, but they rarely forget how you made them feel. And that feeling often determines whether they trust you, respect you, or want to work with you.   The Power of Remembering Names One of the simplest yet most powerful habits of likeable people is remembering and using names. A person’s na...

48 Laws of Power

48 Laws of Power
Introduction

One of the books by Robert Greene is 48 Laws of Power which is one of its kind out of his many best books. In this book, he gives 48 laws of power derived from the lives of powerful historical figures who have excelled with their actions. In this book by Robert Greene, he implies that whether you want to get involved or not, you are always a part of power playing game. In order to gain power, he asks us to use the following 48 Laws of Power list:

48 Laws of Power

1. Never outshine the master: The first law is to not outshine our master or boss as everyone is insecure about their position, and the people above you have the power to retaliate more strongly than others. 
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2. Never put too much trust in friends, learn how to use enemies: We should not put too much trust in our friends as they get envious easily and try to undermine us. Instead, we should learn how to use our enemies as they will work harder to earn our trust.
3. Conceal your intentions: The third law of the 48 Laws of Power says that we should conceal our intentions behind our actions and should create a smokescreen before others so that they cannot prepare a defense against you.
4. Always say less than necessary: We should always speak less than necessary and make it vague, open-ended, and sphinxlike to make it seem more original. The more we say, the more we appear commoner and are more bound to say something foolish.
5. So much depends on reputation- Guard it with your life: The most important cornerstone of power is your reputation; we should make it unassailable and guard it with our life. We can intimidate and win by our reputation alone; on the other hand, we are very vulnerable and attack all sides once we lose it.
6. Court attention at all cost: As everything is judged by its appearance, we should stand out, make ourselves a magnet of attention by appearing larger, more colorful, and more mysterious than others. 
Learnings from the life of Charlie Chaplin:
7. Get others to do the work for you but always take the credit: To save our energy and time, we should use the knowledge, expertise, and legwork of other people to give us more efficiency and speed. We should never do those things which others can do for us.
8. Make other people come to you- Use bait if necessary: According to the eighth law of the 48 Laws of Power, we should always make others come to us to hold the cards. We can also use bait to lure them if necessary.
9. Win through your actions, never through your arguments: The nineth law of the 48 Laws of Power says that we should win through our actions, not through an argument as it is momentary only. 
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10. Infection- Avoid the unhappy and unlucky: Emotional states are considered as infectious as diseases. We might think we are helping others, but we are preparing graves for ourselves. We should tie up with fortunate and happiness instead.
11. Learn to keep people dependent on you: To maintain our independence and more freedom, people should depend on us for their happiness and prosperity.
12. Use selective honesty and generosity to disarm your victim: Open-hearted gestures of generosity and honesty bring down the guard of even the most suspicious people.
13. When asking for help, appeal to people’s self-interest, never depend on their mercy and gratitude: When asking for help, we should cover something of their gain or interest to make them respond enthusiastically instead of asking for mercy or gratitude.
14. Pose as a friend, work as a spy: We should use spies or ask indirect questions at the politico-social event to our rival to gather key information about him. This will keep us one step ahead.
15. Crush your enemy totally: According to the fifteenth law of the 48 Laws of Power, we should crush our enemy totally and completely leaving no one to take revenge.
16. Use absence to increase respect and honor: We should create our value through scarcity. We should use absence to increase our honor and respect.
17. Keep others in suspended terror - Create an air of unpredictability: Being unpredictable keep others off-balance and in a state of trying to explain your actions.
18. Do not build a fortress to protect yourself- Isolation is dangerous: Isolating oneself in the fort will expose us to more dangers, it's better to hide out in the crowd and gain valuable information.
19. Know who you are dealing with- Do not offend the wrong person: as the wrong person can spend the rest of their lives seeking out revenge.
20. Do not commit to anyone: We should maintain our independence by not committing to anyone’s side. 
21. Play a sucker to catch a sucker: You should always play dumb in front of your victim to hide your ulterior motive.
22. Use the surrender tactic- transform weakness into power: Never fight for honor’s sake, surrender instead and use the time to empower yourself.
23. Concentrate your forces: We should keep our energies and forces concentrated at the strongest point so that no one can hollow it out.
24. Play the perfect courtier: The twenty fourth law of the 48 Laws of Power says that one should learn the art of a perfect courtier to attain the highest rank.
25. Recreate yourself: We should never accept the roles that society gives us instead we should recreate ourselves by forging a new identity, the one that brings the attention of the audience and entertains them.
26. Keep your hands clean: We must be seen as a paragon of efficiency and civility and should keep our scapegoats ready to keep our hands clean.
27. Play on people’s need to believe to create a cult-like following: Give people a cause, new faith to follow by keeping our words promising, emphasizing clear thinking, and choosing enthusiasm over rationality.
28. Enter action with boldness: We should not attempt to do things of which we are unsure as our doubts and hesitations about it will infect its execution.
29. Plan all the way to the end: We should plan everything till the ending taking into account all the possible twists of misfortune, obstacles, and consequences as they can destroy all our hard work.
30. Make your accomplishments seem effortless: All our hard work, toil, and clever tricks in achieving something must be concealed and accomplishment should be seen as natural to us.
31. Control the Options: Get Others to Play With the Cards You Deal: Confuse your opponents by giving them two options. These two options will blind them and they will not explore any other option. They will feel that they are in control but both options will ultimately serve you.
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32. Play Into People’s Fantasies: We know that truth is ugly and everyone cannot digest it. When you show them the hope of good future then people will flock towards you and you can wield phenomenal power.
33. Discover Each Man’s Thumbscrew: Focus on finding the weakness of your opponent and reap its benefits in future. These can be secret pleasures, an untamed emotion or desire.
34. Be Royal in Your Own Fashion: Act Like a King to Be Treated Like One: Others treat us how we treat ourselves. If we show that we are downtrodden then people will dump us on our face. Ask for less and that is exactly what you will get from others. Hence demand from others and ask as much as young child ask from his mother.
35. Master the Art of Timing: Never seem to be in a hurry and remember that patience is a virtue. By planning well in advance, you can make time seem to move more slowly. Always see bigger picture from a distance and this can be done only when proactive planning is there in your blood.
“When you show yourself to the world and display your talent
36. Disdain Things You Cannot Have: Ignoring Them is the Best Revenge: The more interest you show in something, the more it will elude you. By acknowledging your opponents, you give them unseen power to harm you. Make them helpless by ignoring them while keeping a vigil on their each and every step.
37. Create Compelling Spectacles: By creating grand gestures or spectacular events, you will dazzle the people around you. They will wait for your next spectacular event as visual gesture are always better than words.
38. Think as You Like, but Behave Like Others: As we are social animals hence we cannot live alone. The more often we go against the mentality of general public, the more they feel irritated. Learn to blend with surroundings. Gain power and unfold your thinking gradually.
39. Stir Up Waters to Catch Fish: If you can play with the anger of your opponents then they will dance on your fingers. This can be done by staying calm while infuriating your opponents. The angrier they become the more power will come in your hands.
40. Despise the Free Lunch: Every precious thing comes with a price. Hence free things must be seen as a burden. By paying, we can avoid the feeling of guilty, deceitful or grateful.
41. Avoid Stepping Into a Great Man’s Shoes: Legends become legends by doing things first but followers never become famous. Establish your own name and identity by taking unique steps.
42. Strike the Shepherd, and the Sheep Will Scatter: In every group, power is generally concentrated around one or two people and understanding those powerful people is very important. Isolate their power and they will die their own death.
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43. Work on the Hearts and Minds of Others: Masses generally like people who work on their concerns. Win their hearts and you will have enormous power in your hands.
44. Disarm and Infuriate with the Mirror Effect: Your opponents become confused when you mirror them. You can easily teach them a lesson by giving them the taste of their own bitter medicine.
45. Preach the Need for Change, but Never Reform Too Much at Once: If you are a leader who acquired the position recently or trying to make a mark, then always respect the way people are living until this point. Too much change can create a revolt and hence make it seem to be a gradual change.
46. Never Appear Too Perfect: Do not appear to be perfect as appearing faultless can become very dangerous for you. By showing harmless vices, you can appear to be more approachable and distinguish other’s envy.
47. Don’t Go Past the Mark You Aimed For: In Victory, Learn When to Stop: Always remember your limit and understand where to stop. Many people ultimately fail after initial successes due to overconfidence. Don’t push beyond your initial target but stop for some time and start again. This will evade you from the envy of others.
48. Assume Formlessness: Bruce Lee once said, “Be Formless my friend, be formless.”To be adaptable of change makes us ungraspable. The powerful people are always adapting the changing environment. Their power comes from the speed of their transformation due to turbulent environment.

Summary

These 48 Laws of Power by Robert Greene can be seen as amoral, ruthless, cunning and instructive but this is the harsh reality. Many people wield power by manipulation of these laws. Understand these laws and save yourself from the tactics of such smart people. You can also ethically implement these laws in your own lives to become the power centre of your social or corporate circle.

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